LAUDERDALE LAKES --

Here’s Johnny.

For many years, when a Lauderdale Lakes resident used EMS transport, any balance left unpaid by insurance is forgiven.

No longer it seems, as the cost of living in Lauderdale Lakes is going up (once again). Residents, already burdened by the highest county property taxes, stormwater fees raised by 160%, fire fees by 30%, are now tripled taxed for EMS services.

Triple taxing? Is that even legal, you say?

If you are “lucky enough” to live in Lauderdale Lakes, you’ll pay taxes for EMS, fire special assessment fees for EMS costs, and now pay more out-of-pocket for EMS transport fees.

Suggestion: take a cab to the ER.

Editor’s Note:
Of course Lauderdale Lakes needs more money, as City Manager jon allen frat bastard keeps giving himself salary increases, while the poor schlub general employee gets the monetary shaft.

This latest brainchild, cooked up by Allen, places the blame on crony/buddy City Auditor Rod Harvey. Said Allen, “The Auditor says we have to do this.”

Since when is Harvey setting policy?

In the words of Bill Clinton, “That takes some serious brass.”

Given the close friendship between Allen, Harvey, and Commissioner eric haynes noob, we thought it odd to have Harvey thrown under the bus.

So we decided to investigate.

MAOS reviewed the “infamous 2011 audited financial statements” and noted there’s supposedly $1 million in EMS receivables (net of allowance for doubtful accounts).

Wait. Aren’t they flush with EMS cash?

So then what gives?

Is Team AllRod now suggesting this entry was bogus? Is the “EMS triple taxing” merely a correction attempt at poor bookkeeping? Is that why they’re fighting the State Audit tooth and nail? Just how many “now that’s fucked up” will Tallahassee find?

Answer: kindly make sure marie elianor moroneconomics’s solar powered Hello Kitty calculator is charged overnight.

Lastly, where’s Broward County Auditor Evan Lukic in all of this?

Missing in action! Someone call Chuck Norris.

MAOS will continue to call this to Lukic’s attention, looking forward to the day we can proudly say, “See you dumb fuck, we told you so.”