Worse(r)

fart

13 Mar Worse(r)

:LL: I’ve had the night to digest S-S beat reporter Larry Barszewski’s article; a tale which fired a couple of torpedoes broadside into the good ship City of Lauderdale Lakes.

My initial reaction to the report focused in on Black, Black & Black Harvey, Covington & Thomas’s comment about the piss poor data flowing from the city’s finance department. And it was only after I let the matter stand for 12 hours, and an anonymous comment, did I finally grasp the import of the story.

It’s worse than I thought. Much :worse(r):. And a good metric to judge just how much worse(r) would be this gem of a comment from Commissioner Gloria Lewis.

I want somebody blindfolded who doesn’t really know about our business.

Mission f***ing accomplished, courtesy of :JA:.

On a positive note, at least this time Lewis didn’t bitch and moan about hiring folks who are unblack.

Let me reword Lewis’s statement so you can see what I see… Allen hired Finance Director Marie Elianor who:

  1. Has no previous experience
  2. Is not a CPA
  3. Is not a Certified Government Financial Manager
  4. Cooks the books
  5. Is intentionally misleading both Commissions (city and county)

Goat meet rope.

But that’s not the (r) part of worse(r).

From the dais, Allen and his asschaps wearing buddy Commissioner Eric Haynes considered it treasonous when folks reached out to the county. Allen and City Attorney Jim (“My Bad“) Brady brought in Daddy Allen to shut us down via a weak-ass cease and desist letter.

Our public response to receiving that letter was “bite me”.  Unofficially, we went with “lick our ballsack.”

But even that isn’t the (r) in worse(r).

No, what is worse(r) is up for your to decide.  Is it:

  1. The fact that Allen knows his FD is putting forward shitty intel
  2. The fact that Allen doesn’t know his FD is putting forward shitty intel

On one hand, Allen would be complicit, and if that is the case, then what does that say about his moral and ethical value system?

Hint: it is non-existent.

To us, the other alternative is even more troubling. What if Allen doesn’t recognize his Chief Financial Officer sucks the left tit? What if he is so caught up in his paranoia (see NDAs, signing of) that he doesn’t recognize the ship is taking on water?

Allen: Hey look Eric, what’s that mahi mahi doing outside of my 2nd story office window?

It comes boils down to either Allen knows Elianor is falsifying the information or he’s too stupid to realize such.

Personally, in the early days of our reporting, I’d have gone with the “too stupid route”, but with the MAOS spotlight blazing sunlight into the darkest recesses of their excesses, there’s no way he can blame others for cutting the cheese here.

He smelt it and he dealt it.

But don’t rush to file your job application, thinking there’s a replacement FD on the horizon. For that to happen, it would take Allen to admit he made a game changing mistake. Admit he was wrong. Admit MAOS was right all along.

That. Will. Never. Happen.

Screw the Commission (both city and County). Screw the taxpayer (both city and County). Allen’s ego, and his resume, are much more important to him than anything else. He’s going to double down and fly that plane right into the side of the mountain.

Most excellent. Should be one hell of a ride. Glad to have ringside seats.

Chaz Stevens

Chaz Stevens

Professional Troublemaker
Father of the world-famous Pabst Blue Ribbon Festivus Pole, Chaz’s antics are sure to entertain, educate, and irritate. Chaz has been appeared on The Colbert Report, The Daily Show, Fox News, and hundreds of national media outlets, and several international newspapers.
Chaz Stevens

@TweetsByMAOS

According to John Stewart, I am the General Patton of the War on Xmas. Father, Pabst Blue Ribbon Festivus Pole. Professional troublemaker.
The Haynes/Allen crime syndicate. http://t.co/BrHoMqB12N - 1 day ago
Chaz Stevens