Update: Checking in with the BionicDildo.

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saintsrow_penetrator

To: Linda Tropepe
Coconut Creek Police Department Records Supervisor

via email

Madam Supervisor;

Given your agency’s delay in handling my PRRs, I just want to make sure nothing got lost. To wit, the following are requests for public information:

  1. According to sworn deposition, former Deputy Chief Robert “BionicDildo” Bionodillo apparently mentioned Sgt. Curtis Cuddeback was under “criminal investigation.” Given this, I am requesting the CCPD Offense Report.
  2. I am requesting the IA Completion/Conclusion Summary for the T-Mobile shooting.
  3. Regarding Bionodillo, any documents regarding his possible “felony indictment.”

I am requesting copies only, NOT RESEARCH.

Additionally, kindly confirm receipt of this request, provide a good faith estimate regarding costs/ETA, and fulfill this request with “limited reasonable delay.”

PS, I am thinking this should be fairly a short order of business, as items #1 and #2 should come back “no document(s) responsive to this request.” And that, right there, is one hell of a story.

***

We just realized this PRR had a problem, so we followed up to Tropepe with this email.

In my records request, I was factually inaccurate.

I stated, “According to sworn deposition, former Deputy Chief Robert “BionicDildo” Bionodillo apparently mentioned Sgt. Curtis Cuddeback was under “criminal investigation.” Given this, I am requesting the CCPD Offense Report.”

What I should have stated was “BionicDildo’s statement was sworn testimony in the Cuddeback Arbitration.”

Apologies.

Chaz Stevens

Chaz Stevens

Professional Troublemaker
Father of the world-famous Pabst Blue Ribbon Festivus Pole, Chaz’s antics are sure to entertain, educate, and irritate. Chaz has been appeared on The Colbert Report, The Daily Show, Fox News, and hundreds of national media outlets, and several international newspapers.
Chaz Stevens

@TweetsByMAOS

According to John Stewart, I am the General Patton of the War on Xmas. Father, Pabst Blue Ribbon Festivus Pole. Professional troublemaker.
Anthony Dispenziere Rallied His Troops. http://t.co/RnSrICAPOh - 2 days ago
Chaz Stevens
Chaz StevensUpdate: Checking in with the BionicDildo.

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