None of the statements match or agree with one another. Who audited Allen and Finance Director Marie Elianor? Are they operating Elianor’s solar powered Hello Kitty calculator in a closet with the light turned off?

We estimate Haynes’ direct salary and benefits to be $1,750 monthly, not including pension contributions and other travel related expenses, all totaling approximately $14,000. While Baseball has the Mendoza Line, we note Haynes is fast approaching the Corey Alston Line.

Further I make a motion that all monies paid direct or indirectly to Commissioner Eric Haynes since October 2012 be recouped since he "forfeited" the office of commissioner as defined by Section 3.10 of the Charter. (That would be approximately $1,750 per month for salary and benefits for 8 months, Oct to May, for a total of $14,000).

Factually speaking, Haynes sold his Lakes house Sep. 4, 2012, and has been using a PO Box in Corals Springs ever since. About two weeks ago, he updated Supervisor of Elections address to his business on State Road 7. We file this under "cover up, more pitiful."

Wait … I stand corrected, that's positively fucking repulsive -- like say picturing Allen dirty dancing in a gold lamé thong (with buddy Eric Haynes making it rain with dollar bills).

We've questioned Holmes and his ability to look the other way -- in the face of outright blatantly criminal activity.

We're told, quite vehemently in fact, that Holmes (like many others) cannot rise up against the machine, taking a stand against City Manager Jon Allen, for that would be the nail in Dan's career.

Commissioner Coleman: commended Marie Elianor for job well done. Someone should remind Coleman that Elianor is in L Lakes now not in Oakland Park doing PowerPoints. And comments that Dan Holmes was a jack of all trades- unfortunately she did not mention that he is not a master of any.

"Improvements to the canal banks in need of stabilization, were, however, halted in 2011 as part of the City's financial crisis." That is false since the City had stormwater improvement grant money and was continuing to collect stormwater assessment fees.

Alston used his city credit card to purchase the van and pay for repairs- city now has a $17k piece of junk. That was fraud. Alston also approved paying Thomas as a code enforcement officer in S. Bay for not working. Both Alston and Thomas have again committed fraud.