An open letter to City Manager Jonathan Allen

openletter

Mr. City Manager;

Good day to you.

When you have a few spare moments, I’d love to speak to you regarding the following.

1)  The letter from my legal firm informing the City of Lauderdale Lakes of our intent to sue over various Florida Public Record law violations.  By the way, the City of Oakland Park provided me with Marie Elianor‘s resume and application.  Free of charge.  And quickly (like two days).  Neither, it seems, an option with your city, being that it takes 40 days to get an estimate.  Suggestion: pay less attention to the NFBPA and more on the city’s business.

Read: Our notice of intent to sue.

1a)  It is my hope that you will continue to be intransigent in this matter.  Really.  Keep violating the law.  It will make my lawyer’s job all that easier.

2)  The upcoming criminal complaint I will be filing with the SAO against you personally for willfully and continually violating Florida Public Record law.

3)  What I would term your “mole hunt”, searching for a supposed leak within your office.  Additionally, I’d like to discuss those confidentiality agreements.  And, in this regard, your definition of the word “public”, as in public service, or public business, or public office.

3a) What is so confidential about the public’s business?  Are you inventing the next electronic heart?  The iPhone 6?  The more you double down, the more we believe you are hiding something.  And what is that I wonder?

3b) I’d also like to learn the reasons behind the transferring of a key aide from your office to the Clerk’s office.  I guess this aide didn’t take any … um … er … trips with you to DC.

4) A discussion about your Friday’s discussion with the City Clerk.  No need to yell at the poor woman, she was just doing her job.

Have your people call my people.  We’ll meet in Court.

Best

Chaz

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Chaz Stevens

Professional Troublemaker
Father of the world-famous Pabst Blue Ribbon Festivus Pole, Chaz’s antics are sure to entertain, educate, and irritate. Chaz has been appeared on The Colbert Report, The Daily Show, Fox News, and hundreds of national media outlets, and several international newspapers.
Chaz Stevens

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According to John Stewart, I am the General Patton of the War on Xmas. Father, Pabst Blue Ribbon Festivus Pole. Professional troublemaker.
New Times: Festivus Pole in Florida Capitol: This Year, a "Rainbow Gay Edition" http://t.co/0Nofd4fbf1 - 8 hours ago
Chaz Stevens