Update: Did you know Coconut Creek has a fire department?

Unknown-Chinese-Maker-–-Tin-Friction-Powered-–-Fire-Truck-–-Close-Up

Ha ha!

Just kidding.

Actually, they don’t. In reality, the “Creek Fire Department” consists of a fire chief (Steve Pollio) and two inspectors; with services contracted out to the City of Margate.

But Coconut Creek didn’t let that small fact get in the way of illegally applying for a Federal grant (aka firefighting money).

Check this shit out.

Back in 2010, Creek was awarded a $370,000 FEMA Assistance to Firefighters grant, federal cash to ostensibly been used for …

Well, we rightly don’t know what the f*** for, being there’s no fire department.

Editor’s Note: How about a fleet of Red Bull Mini-Coopers! Actually, according to Public Records, the money was for two CAD dispatch systems, with the remainder being allocated elsewhere. Ding ding – that’s a no-no.

Under the grant guidelines, Creek would not have been eligible for funding — due to the fact their day to day operations were managed by another fire department (aka Margate). In the grant application, Creek officials indicate the ILA between Margate and Creek had been dissolved (lie), forcing Creek to reconstitute their own fire rescue (another lie).

Riddle me this — does lying on a Federal Grant application sound even remotely legal?

All of this falls right at the feet of City Manager Dave Rivera and Pollio. Rivera has since back peddled – basically did everything, but blame the dog. Threats, intimidation, the works.

Busted f***er. That shit don’t work with me.

We’ve reached out to our FEMA OIG contact (yes, we have one), asking for an investigation.

Update:

I spoke to my Federal OIG friends.  I was told, “this matter was looked into.  Because (a) Creek self-reported, (b) didn’t get the cash, and (c) it would be hard to prove fraud, there’s ‘nothing to see here’.”

Which is as I would expect — I don’t view Uncle Sam’s inaction in a bad light.

The positive spin of this — Rivera and his cronies better start thinking twice about being so bold with their nonsense.

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Chaz Stevens

Chaz Stevens

Professional Troublemaker
Father of the world-famous Pabst Blue Ribbon Festivus Pole, Chaz’s antics are sure to entertain, educate, and irritate. Chaz has been appeared on The Colbert Report, The Daily Show, Fox News, and hundreds of national media outlets, and several international newspapers.
Chaz Stevens

@TweetsByMAOS

According to John Stewart, I am the General Patton of the War on Xmas. Father, Pabst Blue Ribbon Festivus Pole. Professional troublemaker.
Lauderdale Lakes Finance Director Marie Elianor at it again! http://t.co/xPfzpbHb7i - 17 hours ago
Chaz Stevens